I was listening to an interesting podcast this week about Solo Touring at Disney World (Episode #523 posted at WDW Today) and was a little bothered by a couple of comments the guys made. (The “guys” are podcasters Matt Hochberg, Mike Newell, Mike Scopa, and Len Testa.) The first comment was about what resorts these guys stay at when they travel alone to Disney World:
If I go by myself, I’m going to stay at a Value. But if I go with Carol, I’ll go with a Moderate or Deluxe. I can’t see wasting money on a Moderate and a Deluxe just for me. (Mike Scopa)
I’ve seen similar posts made by men who travel to Las Vegas alone. If they’re going with their significant others, they’ll stay at a nice resort like the Wynn or Bellagio, but if they’re going alone, they’ll stay at a cheap place like the Imperial Palace. Is this a guy thing? I totally don’t get it. It seems to me that what they’re saying is that they don’t consider themselves to be worth the price of a nice hotel. That’s just sad to me. I might stay at a less expensive hotel because I literally don’t have the money for something nicer, but I will never skimp on myself if I have the money to pamper myself. To me, saying otherwise shows a lack of self-worth. If it’s your vacation, it doesn’t matter that you’re traveling alone. You alone ARE worth spending the extra money on quality accommodations.
The second comment was even sadder:
I’ve never had a table service meal by myself. . .I would feel out of place. . .You feel like the loser at a dance who didn’t bring a date.
Wow, what a lack of self esteem that comment displays. First off, why should you feel like a loser because you’re eating in a restaurant by yourself? People do it all the time. Everyone needs to eat, and if you want to eat a nice meal rather than fast food, it’s your prerogative. Again, it’s all about what you feel you are worth. Trust me, you’re worth table service.
But being concerned about “looking like a loser” implies that you think other people will actually notice you eating alone and give it enough thought to form judgments. If you feel this way too, you need to take to heart something Mark Twain once said:
You stop worrying about what other people think about you when you realize how little they do.
Most of the time, people are so wrapped up in their own lives, they don’t even notice you sitting in the restaurant, let alone the fact that you’re dining by yourself.
Final thought: When we assume we only have value when we’re with someone else, that is not a good thing. If you truly feel it’s a waste of money to splurge on a nice hotel or that you’ll look like a loser if you eat at a restaurant alone, you need to work on your sense of self-worth.
